Spring has sprung,
the
grass is riz,
I
wonder where the flowers is?
I seriously did wonder 'where the flowers is’;
after all, it is spring. This morning I wandered down to the garden in pursuit
of finding some, the result being a bunch of different and colourful flowers.
As is regularity with me, I started thinking.
About everything - the thoughts going through my head were as random as weeds
and as variously shaped and coloured as my collection of flowers.
Sometimes I feel as if my mind is a garden. How an
idea can be like coming across a fruit on a tree - you might want to leave it
for some time to grow and ripen, so it may become richer and sweeter. Thoughts
may be scanned like a patch of flowers for one of interest to be
picked. Or the way unwanted ones pop up like weeds and even if you get rid
of them, they come back.
I guess I was wandering through two gardens,
browsing both thoughts and flowers. The real garden is lacking in maintenance,
overgrown, and taken over by weeds (which can resemble my mind sometimes.) It's
not beautiful, but since I've become a lover of photography, I've been able to
admire a place for just a small part of it, because that part - even if it’s only
small - can fill the frame of a camera. I could have a subject in front of a
patch of flowers, and no one else would see the surrounding weeds outside of
the frame. This lead to a few thoughts about appearance and gave me a different
perspective on beauty - that nothing has to be completely perfect, because
everything has imperfections, and you must admire the features that are
beautiful. This is something that has helped me on how I view my own
appearance.
It's so easy to find things in ourselves that we
don't like. While I'm very insecure that I have permanent scarring under my lip
from an accident when I was younger, most people don't notice. I'm constantly
looking at how one of my hips is higher than the other, a collarbone
more prominent, a slightly twisted ribcage and misshapen back (all of
that being a result of slouching all the time, causing my back to curve as I
grew), but I'm told it's not as noticeable as I think. What I’m
saying is that we often judge ourselves (particularly our abilities and
appearance) too harshly, scrutinizing every imperfection until we make
ourselves feel terrible, instead of focusing on some of the things we like
about ourselves.
Its times like these that I step back and can see how my thoughts can truly
affect how I see myself and thus how others see me as well. This makes me
realise that I need to endeavour to look at what I like about myself rather
than every little imperfection. A goal I will continue to strive towards on a
daily basis.
My lovely mum took these photos on an afternoon walk.
The Floral dress was bought second hand at a market stall a long time ago, I bought the orange dress on sale at JayJays (also some time ago), and it's a bit too small for me now. My mum bought me the vintage 60's pin, the memory-wire bracelet is one
that I made when I was eleven. Green Colorado leather bag, vintage 70's leather boots, and belt - all from charity shops. The ring was my Grandma's.
Oh, and sorry if this post was little long!
